A recent retiree was given a set of golf clubs as a parting gift by his former co-workers. He had never golfed before. Thinking he'd try the game, he asked the local pro for lessons and explained to him that he knew nothing whatever of the game.

The pro showed him the stance and swing and then said, "Just hit the ball toward the flag on the first green."

The novice teed up and smacked the ball straight down the fairway and onto the green, where it stopped inches from the hole.

"Now what?" the fellow asked the speechless pro.

"Uh... you're supposed to hit the ball into the cup." the pro finally said, once he was able to speak again.

"Oh great!" the beginner replied, "NOW you tell me!"